Post-first real monologue thoughts

As I prepared to perform my first, true monologue in front of my Acting 1 class I was not as afraid as I was on the first day. In fact, I was hardly scared at all. The only thing I was mildly worried about was if I truly had it all memorized. (Now keep in mind, because I was prepared and did have it all memorized, I was hardly nervous, whereas when I am unsure about anything within my monologue or my preparation, I get rather anxious about it. When you are worried about a performance, you can often evaluate how well-prepared you are by how nervous or anxious you feel.) Another thing that added to my confidence was my classmates. In this particular class, we got over the hard part at the beginning, when we didn't know each other, our teacher, or anythings else. Our first monologue, if you recall, was the more vulnerable, difficult one. Now that we as a class are comfortable with each other it is much easier and meaningful when one of us performs. It helps us get to know each other better and better. So, with these things kept in mind, I performed my first and greatest monologue I ever have in my lifetime. It felt good to do something well, especially when I hadn't thought of acting as my strong suit. It felt freeing to be able to express what my character was feeling and to do so powerfully. I received many compliments and confirmations of my well-done performance. I felt good. I felt confident and happy in not only that day, but in what I was doing with my life. It was a good reminder that I could do what I wanted to do and do it well, I just had to remember that. Everyone has their good days and bad and that day happened to be one of the really good ones. I felt lucky. One thing that was important in my success was choosing the right piece (keep an eye out for a upcoming blog post on just that). I had picked a great piece for me personally, and that added greatly to my accomplishment (and will add to my accomplishments to come). I am so grateful for the opportunity I have to be doing what I am doing with the people I am doing it. I have a wonderfully talented teacher and some truly wise and supportive classmates who make my success possible (also keep an eye out for an upcoming post of how I've used what I've learned so far from them to do well).
This performance went well and I was very proud of myself for preparing and performing it so. I did the best I could to let go of my fear and inhibitions and to go for it and that's what makes a performer. A person who can push through the things holding them back and let it fuel them.